Smiles and Sorrows

So much has happened since I last posted.  We left our house in Flower Mound and relocated to Cleburne where my husband’s coffee shop is located.  I love the old house we live in.  It has large rooms and a kitchen where you could set up a dance floor.  The guest room is all set up and is so comfy I think Bob wants to make it into a man cave–Not happening.  It has a nice sized pantry and laundry room.  My bedroom is long with built in shelves and dressers and closets at the end.  One of them is a shoe closet.  Not that I need one.  My 4 pairs of shoes are very lonely in there since it has shoe shelves floor to ceiling.  There is a sewing room at the back of the house that is all windows so that it is bright and sunny with a huge backyard for Bruno.  There is even a very large workshop in the back that is big enough to fit the boat if we wanted that.  All in all I think the house fits our needs very well and we are comfortable there.  Of course, there are some drawbacks.  One bathroom.  One bathroom?  Really?  It’s a big bathroom, but really?  One bathroom?  Enough said.  Everyone knows that this is a drawback–a drawback to the 50’s.  🙂  Drawback number 2:  Window units and Dearborn heaters.  I actually kind of enjoy the Dearborn heaters.  They are really warm and Bruno will actually whine if they are off for too long.  But, window units are a pain.  We haven’t lived through a 106 degree summer yet, but I’m not looking forward to it.  The biggest drawback of all is that I work in McKinney–a town 76 miles away.  I leave the house every day at 5:45 and I don’t get home most nights until 7:30 or later.  It just makes me feel tired all the time.  I’m looking in this area, but haven’t found anything yet.  Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Our Dearborn heater which heats our living room.

Our Dearborn heater which heats our living room.

shoe closet

Lonely, lonely, shoes…

Moving has made me go through that old closet and believe me I am down to nubbins.  I need some new clothes!  Most of my t-shirts had holes in them.  I secretly still want to keep them, but am planning to buy a couple and then get rid of a couple a little at a time until they are all replaced.  No, really.  I’ve joined a fabric co-op so that I can get busy on those bags, and I’m holding down the weight I lost during my first challenge.

Now for a few sorrows.  My husband had a heart attack in February and had a quadruple bi-pass on Valentine’s Day.  I never knew this was such a long recovery.  The doctor said 6 months to a year!  He’s doing very well and every day is a little better, but I can’t stand to see him suffering.  The difficult thing about heart surgery is that it creates a change in your body, your emotions and your spirit.  It’s like a metamorphosis  where you’re hoping for a butterfly, but you could get a beetle.  Let me just say, it’s mostly butterfly, but the occasional beetle does crawl out from time to time.  🙂  All in all we are walking this walk together and once school is out, I’m going to make new goals.  I believe that the one thing I learned too late was that everything–and I mean everything–needs a plan.  My current plan is to walk through all of these changes in  hope and faith that the path I’m on is the right one.  More specifics to come.

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Wow!  I’m back from Boston and I didn’t gain a pound.  I didn’t lose a pound either, but hey I feel good about not gaining while on vacation.  The fact of the matter is, I didn’t gain any weight because my health conscious daughter walked my feet all over Boston.  From Cambridge, across the bridge, and all the way over to Fenway Park!  I have to say though, it was a beautiful walk and maybe that’s the best way to see Boston.  There’s beautiful architecture everywhere and some of the oldest buildings in the country.  I think Fenway is the oldest ballpark isn’t it?  Well, here are a few picture to prove you should take your own walk around Boston.  🙂

This is the beautiful MIT man sculpture. I’m standing there with my beautiful Texas man Bob.

Beautiful architecture surrounded by trees. Not uncommon in Boston

Bob and Dolly in Kenmore Park just blocks from Fenway. See the giant CITGO sign? You can see it anywhere you are in Boston.

 

 

I’ve been reading Matthew chapter 3 this week and it reminded me of those old movies where the gangsters go out and kill people and then race the next day to the church to repent, just to go out and do it again.  Maybe the Pharisees were the gangsters of their day.  Who knows?  It certainly seems similar anyway.

This month I’ve decided to do something nice for my principals (anonymously of course).  I was thinking a little care package with some lip balm, lotion, nice pens and some sticky notes.  Any other suggestions about what I should put in?  School starts next week for us and the kids come the following week.  I’m excited and am readying my make up and hair supplies.  Ha ha.

I sewed myself a dress this week and got my pattern all ready for my bags. My dress is purple and pink.  Not usually my colors, but I’m kind of excited about it.  I like to sew.  It’s creative and productive at the same time.

Goals in check and in process–we won’t talk any more about the closet until I get busy and start.  lol

Happy Day to all and Good luck with your goals!

 

A long long time ago…..

A long, long time ago there was a woman who weighed an awful lot.  Ok, so she still weighs an awful lot and constantly struggles with her weight.  I have been getting control lately and have lost 17 lbs using weight watchers.  Basically I track my points but I haven’t incorporated much else at the site.  I’ll tell you what it has done for me though.  I don’t crave sugar as much.  I lose weight every week.  I still eat the way I like to, but I don’t eat as much.

Although all of this is true, I think, in a way, I had to be ready in myself to do it.  So, how do you ready yourself.  I’m not sure.  I think you have to get to a place where  you think to yourself, “This is ridiculous.  I have to get my life back in control.”  It also helps to have someone encouraging you and monitoring your progress.  My daughter calls me periodically and says, “Are you still keeping track of your points?  Have you lost weight this week?”  Since I know she is going to do this, I stay pretty faithful to the program.

The other thing I’d have to say is, I’m pretty rebellious.  I think a part of me liked the weight because I was deciding what to eat and wasn’t letting anyone else decide for me.  How stupid is that?  That’s like cutting your nose off to spite your face.  So, in some ways, I had to let go of my own selfish ideas about who I was and what I believed about myself.  Believe me, I’m still fat, but my clothes fit better.  I’m still fat, but I’m losing weight every week.  I’m still fat, but I don’t crave things like I used to.  I’m more in control of this creature that I live in.  Isn’t that the way it ought to be?

A Bump in the Road and a Broken Wagon

Well, this bump in the road–let’s just call it my lack of commitment–caused me to not only fall off the wagon, but broke the wagon into pieces.  Maybe a wagon wasn’t the best choice in the first place.  The walk would’ve done me good.  I would’ve burned some calories and maybe lifted my spirit along the way too.  I think sometimes I spend way too much time soothing myself with things, that if I would just take time to reason through, I wouldn’t eat in the first place.  Like, for instance that lovely gas station muffin where I read on the label lately that one serving was 1/3 muffin.  Yes, that’s right, 1/3 muffin.  Seriously?  Who in the world eats 1/3 muffin?  I’d eat the whole doggone thing.  Oh, by the way, that 1/3 muffin serving is 230 calories.  That means the whole muffin is a whopping 690 calories.  You’ve got to be kidding me.  See how reason gets in the way of indulging yourself?  Needless to say I won’t be eating one of those again.

My other eye-opener was a Quiznos sandwich.  I love Quiznos and probably could eat one everyday for lunch if incentive was provided.  Until–yes, reason set in.  I decided to look up the nutritional quality of the sandwich.  At first I was pleasantly surprised, but then–dun dun dun–the sandwich was a whopping 1200 calories.  Again I say, “Seriously?”  Needless to say, I won’t be eating Quiznos any more.  Oh, I want to.  I just can’t.

This week I plan to rely on my reason instead of my self-indulgence.  I’m getting off the cart, picking myself up, dusting myself off, putting on my cross-trainers, and reasoning myself right into walking instead of riding my way to a better me.  I can do this.  I just have to be reasonable.  🙂

The Battle Continues

Some days I feel like I’m in a battle with myself. Should I eat the cookie? Should I ignore the cookie? Really I think, “Should I really have to battle with myself over a cookie?” But the fact is, I do. Change is difficult and my body is just as stubborn as my mind. My body says to my mind, “I want a cookie!” and my mind rationalizes, “So what’s one cookie? One cookie isn’t going to affect my whole life.” as my body rants on “I want a cookie!” Maybe it’s so hard because my body is so insistent and has only one thing to say. While my mind must work through all the pros and cons and make a decision when in reality, the decision has already been made. I made the decision to eat healthier.

Eating healthy can mean a lot of things depending on who you are and where you live, but we all know that if you have a weakness for cookies, you should probably avoid them. So, I’ve decided that, for the most part I need to avoid sugary foods. I have a weakness for them. We can’t give up food altogether, but we can recognize where we have the most problems and take steps toward avoiding those foods that tempt us the most.

The battle rages, but I’m charging forward knowing some things are worth the fight. My health is one of those things. My first weigh in since I started up again is Monday. Wish me luck!

Make a Plan

My daughter asked me this week if I was proud of the progress I had made this week. Have I been doing what I set out to do? Well, I’d have to say I’m at about 50%. Did I eat breakfast everyday? Yep. Did I exercise 3 times this week? Nope.  Have I tried to look my best everyday this week?  Uh, everyday but one.  I even wore jewelry!  I NEVER wear jewelry.  And, as for updating my blog, you can read for yourself.  🙂

So, what will I do differently next week?  Here are my goals for next week:

  • drastically reduce the amount of sugar in my diet
  • plan meals for breakfast lunch and dinner
  • drink more water!

All of these goals go along with the goals I’ve already set, so I feel like they’re doable.  I just have to start paying attention to the details.  It’s taken me a long time to get to this point, but I have come to realize that everything–and I mean everything–needs a plan, right down to the way you organize your desk.  I thought I could just keep one leg hanging and kind of dance my way through life.   I guess there’s some of that too, but mostly life needs a plan.  Get it in your head now.  Don’t wait till you’re 50 to figure it out.  Make a plan and act on it.  One more time–Make a plan and ACT on it.  You can, I can, we all can make a plan.

Resolutions 2012

I was talking with my first graders about resolutions and they decided the best resolution was just to be a nicer person.  Well, I guess that is a great resolution.  We can all afford to be a little nicer to each other, but it’s not very specific.  How am I going to be nicer?  So I decided we needed to look up the definition and post it on our vocabulary board.  Here’s what we came up with–in first grader language.  A resolution is when someone is determined to make a change for the better.  That word DETERMINED caught my attention.  I think I often have good intentions for change.  I often am willing to make a change as long as I don’t have to be DETERMINED to do it.  So then it begs the question:  What can I be determined to do?

Here’s what I’ve decided.  I am going to give myself 3 months.  3 short months.  In those 3 months I am going to change my habits for the better.

  • Habit change 1:  I am going to have something for breakfast everyday, even if it’s just a piece of fruit.
  • Habit change 2:  I will do some type of exercise 3 days a week.  This does not count walking my dog, which I do anyway, unless it’s an extra or longer walk.
  • Habit change 3:  I am going to try to look my best everyday.  This means I will wear mascara, jewelry and nice clothing to work and I won’t stay in my jammies on weekends.
  • Habit change 4:  I will commit to updating this blog every Saturday with trials and successes and hopefully a good story or 2.  🙂

I feel like I can do all of these things for 3 months.  Anyone can do something for 3 months.  Right?  After that I will reevaluate what to do next.  Consider being determined this year as you make your resolutions.  We can be determined together!